Why I hate small talk – let’s “big talk”!

The idea for this post stemmed from a video I watched on YouTube a while ago – the idea that some of us out there are more interested in what is known as “big talk” rather than “small talk”. This is the concept of approaching someone and asking them deeper questions which revolve around us and our existence or the personal experiences of someone else, rather than the everyday questions of “how are you?”

This is something that I’ve contemplated for a while, being someone who finds the overused conversation of “hi, how are you?”, “yeah I’m good, how are you?”, “I’m good too, thanks” really irritating. I find that if you don’t know the person well enough, then the likelihood of you actually opening up to the question to give a meaningful answer is very low, so what is the point in asking it?

The woman in this video puts together a selection of clips where she asks strangers deeper questions and I love the idea of this. It gets people to actually dig their brain for a suitable answer and think beyond the realms of everyday thinking which is a lot more beneficial than replying by reflex. So I thought, why not bring the same to the blogging world?

I will ask an array of questions below that are considered “big talk” and it would be great if you could pick one (or as many as you like) to answer in the comments and we can have a discussion!ย Similarly, if you have a question you’d like to share, feel free to share it too as I’d love to answer ๐Ÿ™‚

  1. Do you believe in life after death? How would you want to live on in the afterlife? How do you think you’ll live on?
  2. Do you think there is an alternate reality and if so, how does it correspond to this world?
  3. Do you believe in soulmates or having more than one?
  4. Is anything in this world real?
  5. Is evil born within someone or does it grow with age?
  6. Does true freewill exist?
  7. What is considered art?
  8. Does complete happiness exist or is it just an unobtainable concept?
  9. Is there ever a right or wrong? Is anything really objective?
  10. Can we really believe anything anyone says when we have only experienced our own conscious reality?

You can now read my answers to these questionsย here.

Image result for small talk

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12 thoughts on “Why I hate small talk – let’s “big talk”!

  1. I don’t quite believe in life after death. I actually just think we get reincarnated. The moment your soul leaves your body, you get reborn into another body which will be raised in a different country by different people and all.
    Haha. I also hate small talk, these are my kind of talks – deep conversations ๐Ÿ’–

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oooh, fun! I want to answer these questions b/c I’m feeling deep today… as a heads-up, I am a Christian so my answers will be based on Christian doctrine!
    1. Do you believe in life after death? How would you want to live on in the afterlife? How do you think youโ€™ll live on?
    -Yes, I do believe in life after death, and in heaven and hell. But not like “heaven is clouds, hell is fire” kind of thing–just, are you separated from God forever or joined with Him eternally? I want to be with God forever because He is good–and I hope that I’ll leave the legacy of a truth-seeker on Earth!
    Do you think there is an alternate reality and if so, how does it correspond to this world?
    -I don’t think there’s an alternate reality b/c I have no reason to believe so–but it’s fun to think about!
    Do you believe in soulmates or having more than one?
    -Alfter my mom passed away, my dad remarried, and both marriages were/are happy and healthy, so with that evidence I can’t believe that one of them was his “soulmate.”
    Is anything in this world real?
    -Yes, that’s a leap of faith that I choose to take, as it’s a basic premise for most philosophical discourse!
    Is evil born within someone or does it grow with age?
    -We all have original sin and must choose good over evil every day.
    Does true freewill exist?
    -Yes (you can accept or reject salvation), but at the same time God has a plan for everything. It’s hard to wrap my head around, because I’m not God.
    What is considered art?
    -Oh gosh… restricting our definition to visual art, I don’t think that “anything can be art” but I can’t possibly define it in the comments on a blog post! ๐Ÿ˜€ Short answer: it has to embody truth, goodness, or beauty–and the idea behind it doesn’t make it art!
    Does complete happiness exist or is it just an unobtainable concept?
    -Happiness is based on pleasure and pain. Joy is not restricted to these stimuli. Since nothing will ever be perfect in this life, we can’t be “completely happy.”
    Is there ever a right or wrong? Is anything really objective?
    -My favorite soap box! Short answer: yes, because no one’s a nihilist/moral relativist. when you hold a gun to their head.
    Can we really believe anything anyone says when we have only experienced our own conscious reality?
    -Again: leap of faith I choose to take, since you can’t really get anywhere if you don’t!

    That was so much fun–thanks for this insightful post!

    Liked by 2 people

    • ahh I love that you answered them all! It was really interesting to read from a different perspective (which is one of the many reasons I made this post). So thank you so much for commenting and leaving your thoughts! I’m thinking of perhaps writing a future post on my blog answering these questions myself ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Honestly, I hate small talk as well. But instead of these big questions, I’d rather simply talk about favourite tv shows or how our day is going etc. I guess it’s mostly because I find it very hard to put my thoughts into words on the spot when asked such questions? I don’t know. But yeah, I like neither small talk or big talk ๐Ÿ˜‚

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love big talk! You learn so much more about a person. Just FYI, I believe in God so my answers reflect that. Here goes…
    -Do you believe in life after death? How would you want to live on in the afterlife? How do you think youโ€™ll live on?
    I do believe in life after death. I never really think about “how” I’ll live in the afterlife, but I hope to be reunited with God and abide in his embrace.
    -Do you think there is an alternate reality and if so, how does it correspond to this world?
    This question made me think of The Matrix. No, I don’t believe in alternate realities, but every time I read a good book I let myself imagine I’m in that world which is kind of like alternate reality. Maybe?
    -Do you believe in soulmates or having more than one?
    Well yes and no. I mean I think that there are a few people who you connect with on a much deeper level than with anyone else, like you operate on the same wavelength or something, “kindred spirits” if you will, but I don’t believe in soulmates in the sense that there is one person out there who you are bound to for eternity.
    -Is anything in this world real?
    I mean if I deny the reality of everything that I can see and touch and feel then I’m bound to deny what I believe in so yes, I think everything in this world is real.
    -Is evil born within someone or does it grow with age?
    I believe that God created everything with inherent goodness and beauty. I don’t believe that anyone is born evil or that evilness (is that a word?) develops with age, but that with every unkind act, a person corrupts their soul just a little bit more until eventually evil becomes their default.
    -Does true freewill exist?
    I believe God has a plan for everything and sees everything, but that every person chooses the path they follow. I don’t know how to put it into words… ๐Ÿ™‚
    -What is considered art?
    Oooh really hard question. I don’t think everything is art (don’t get me started not the folly called modern art!) but I think any work, whether visual art or music, that can effectively convey an idea or feeling and build upon the beauty of the natural world is art.
    -Does complete happiness exist or is it just an unobtainable concept?
    I think complete happiness exists; I just don’t think that it exists in this world. This world is imperfect therefore it is impossible for every feeling to be completely pure an unaffected by outside influences. I do believe however that you can create near perfect happiness in this world if you work hard at it.
    -Is there ever a right or wrong? Is anything really objective?
    I feel that there are a lot of things that are clearly right or wrong because they either amplify the beauty of the world or are completely contrary to that beauty.
    -Can we really believe anything anyone says when we have only experienced our own conscious reality?
    I should hope so! Otherwise where would I be!

    This was actually really fun! Because I don’t generally do “big talk” with people (even though I would like to) I never really put all of the feelings I had about these kinds of questions into words so it was a learning opportunity.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. […] A week ago I published a blog post about why I hate small talkย and why we should “big talk”. I gave you all a list of questions and some of you answered them which was really great and I enjoyed looking at it from a different perspective. Here I will be sharing my own answers in response to the questions so you can learn a bit more about me in return ๐Ÿ™‚ […]

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