I have recently finished reading How to Survive the End of the World by Aaron Gillies (@technicallyron) which gave a really interesting insight into dealing with anxiety. Whilst researching for the book, he asked various people “How would you define anxiety?” At the end, he asks the reader to write their definitions in the front of their edition of the book.
I think this is such a super interesting question because people explain it in different ways. Here are some definitions that I’ve come up with, based on my personal experiences. Please feel free to share yours in the comments.
Anxiety is worrying excessively over something that you know is completely irrational, and yet your body won’t listen.
Anxiety is the fight between needing to escape and wanting to stay – escaping the panic but afraid of being left alone to think.
Anxiety is feeling like the edges of the world are the sphere of your skull; everyone else is on another planet that you can’t quite escape to.
Anxiety is the worm at the back of your mind; sometimes it’s buried within the apple and you can pretend it’s not there, but when it comes back up you can’t help but notice.
Anxiety is sitting out a blazing fight inside your head whilst seemingly calm on the outside.
Anxiety is pretending to be confident so much that others eventually believe you, but you know you can never believe it yourself.
Anxiety is waiting for the next train and it being delayed and rushing to another platform and rushing back to the previous platform and then finding out there were no trains after all and it was all pointless. You could have taken a taxi but your mind doesn’t like the easy route.
Anxiety is smiling and crying at the same time. No one else notices and sometimes you don’t even notice yourself.
This week is Mental Health Awareness week so I thought it was a good time to share these thoughts. I’m feeling great at the moment and a lot happier than I was a year ago so I really wanted to share this post to help those who may be in the place I was last year. If you feel like these relate to you, it may be worth considering talking to someone about it – whether that is a family member, a friend, or a doctor. It’s not a weakness to put your hands up and say “hey, this sounds like me”. These words define anxiety, but they don’t define you.
You can view my other posts for Mental Health Awareness week here:
help me see the real me. [poem]